November 25, 2011 by Manny Wordsmith
Is anyone thinking about how much weight they’re gonna gain from this week? Well don’t. Really…don’t. You will have more than enough time in this next coming month to get out, shake your ass and make a fool of yourself at your favorite Christmas/New Year’s Eve party. I won’t be consuming any spiked eggnog (lactose intolerant…unfortunately) or champagne (ugh…bubbles), but I will be posted by the mistletoe for any lovely ladies who’ve been waiting for the chocolate man of their dreams.
Yes, I just refered to myself as the chocolate man.
But seriously, we have a lot of celebrating to do. Christmas and New Year’s Eve have both been lackluster for me. Christmas hasn’t been the same since I was a kid. I can’t get that warm fuzzy feeling anymore. My heart has been replaced with coal and the echoed grumblings of Mr. Scrooge. And it’s not because I have a bunch of money that I don’t want to use, it’s more about the opposite…I wish I had more money I could use. Hopefully, I can ignore all the commercials and just concentrate on the fact that Christmas is about love and family and not about massive consumerism. But damn, these companies make bad ass commercials.
New Year’s Eve on the other hand is only a mess because I’m NEVER where the party is at…ever. Of course last year I went to three of them and passed out next to a fifth of Jose Cuervo. Hmm, ok maybe last year was alright, but the years before it weren’t, so this year I’m shooting for the big times, the V.I.P., the bottle service. I just hope I won’t have to pick-up that stripping job to afford it…
All in all, this is the time to celebrate. Weather it’s celebrating having lots of dough to spread, or just celebrating the end of a long tiring semester. Just keep those friends and family close by and that rum cake even closer. Peace!