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April 25, 2011 by Manny Wordsmith

Not the healthiest items I’ve consumed in the morning, but not the unhealthiest either. When I walked into the kitchen looking for my usual breakfast, which consists of a Nutra-grain bar and banana, I found a bucket of leftover Easter candy instead…

Yes, I could have searched harder for something healthier. I could have made some eggs and toast, but the Twix called to me. And what kind of guy would I have been if I just grabbed one and left the rest of the family in the bucket to rot? I’d be a terrible human being. I don’t really know how that Reese’s bartered her why in, but she did. She was the red-headed step-child of the bunch, and was eaten last. Her only saving grace was that she was shaped like an egg and I still had some Easter joy left in me.

My weekend was filled with lots of drunken debauchery that I was unable to capture on camera. Let’s just say I threw up on my shoes, freak danced with an old lady, and tried to tongue kiss a lesbian. Not all in the same day or in that order, but those events happened. Spin-off stories of these incidents and the supporting cast that were involved in them will be fairly documented for your reading pleasure.

Current soundtrack of my life

1. “Banquet” – Bloc Party

2. “Cannonball” – The Breeders

3. “Untitled” – Interpol

4. “Machine” – Yeah Yeah Yeahs

5. “First Day Of My Life” – Bright Eyes

6. “Black Swan” – Thom Yorke

Back to writing my paper…


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