And Today’s Forecast…Shit.

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April 18, 2011 by Manny Wordsmith

So this is what the outside looked like this morning

Needless to say I wasn’t very happy.

There’s nothing I can do. There’s no special dance I can bust into to make the right weather sync to the correct season. I barely can get my iPod to sync to my Macbook! Bitching and complaining does nothing to get the job done, but at least it makes us all feel better. I love hearing from the grumpy cynics who don’t get happy about spring till the Summer Solstice.

“Grumble grumble…we’re from Michigan…grumble…you should always expect God to take shits on us!”

Why would I want to expect that? Why would I want to go outside every day knowing that no matter what month or season it is my neighborhood could still look like fucking Narnia?

This is saying nothing personally against Narnia. I’d love to save some talking badgers and get advice from wise lions, but that’s neither here nor there. The point is that most of us in this angry, drab state, want to believe that sunny skies are coming to stay! Not too long ago I wrote a blog embracing the spring sun and hoped it would be my savior. Instead of sticking around, it left. Now I’m just as sad as I was when I was a kid right after I watched Drago kill Apollo Creed.

“Why didn’t you throw the towel in time Rock? WHY!?”

I seriously blamed slow motion for months…

This winter blast leaves me slightly broken. I’m not sure how many more times I’ll shake my fist at the weather before I become one of those cynics. I expect at some point for the weather to start looking like every scene from the movie Se7en.

Whoa! wrong video and not what I expected. I must have gotten the links crossed or something. This kid is singing his heart out though. I can’t actually understand anything except for the chorus, but I can feel his words! It’s unfortunate that he named himself after a very bloody and twisted cinematic thriller. Now he’ll never break into the American market. No self-respecting blue-blooded American girl would go near him. Especially if a wily Kevin Spacey is planning on putting some heads in some boxes! I wouldn’t wish that on any Bieber-haired Korean kid. But who knows, he might be asking for it. He had to have said some ill shit for his girl to try to smash up that Volvo. She’s lucky those strategically placed cardboard boxes were there…or lights out.

A little more off subject than usually, but you’ll survive!

I hope the weather has some sort of predictable stability to it. Finals are coming up soon and a great way to celebrate finishing those will be drinking someplace outside with a fresh pair of ray-bans and flip-flops. Till tomorrow fam. Peace!

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